“There are three things that I know for a fact in the world,” David Letterman recently said after receiving the 2017 Mark Twain Prize for Humor. “These are universal. Absolutely universal. 1) If somebody comes up to you with a bag of M&M’s, pours out a handful in your hand, automatically, you will start doing this (shaking hand back and forth). Absolutely no control over that. You’ll be doing this before you know it. 2) If you pull a nose out of your hair…er…a hair out of your nose, I don’t care if you do it a hundred times, each time you will sneeze. And 3) if you help someone, in any way, big or small, automatically you will feel good about yourself. Those are the three things that I know. And I’ve seen a guy pull a nose out of his hair. Years ago at the fair”.
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